When you get on the parenting train, you don't get off. The journey through parenthood can be scary as selfless and sacrificial love must be made; and it is only as a child matures and gains experience that his or her view of the world begins to change. In “The Possessive,” Sharon Olds tells of a possessive mother who is losing control of her daughter as she evolves into a young woman and begins to rebel. In “Those Winter Sundays,” Robert Hayden tells of the repentant son who reflects on his apathy towards his father who demonstrated sacrificial love. These poems are similar in that they both explore the relationship between parent and child, where parents demonstrate unconditional love for their children who later mature and gain different insights into parenting. However, they differ in that "The Possessive" conveys the idea of ​​a controlling and jealous mother whose daughter rebels, while "Those Winter Sundays" conveys the idea of ​​a more unlimited love, in which a child grows to understand the sacrifices of his father. plagiarism. Get a tailor-made essay on "Why Violent Video Games Shouldn't Be Banned"? Get an original essay. Similar to “Those Winter Sundays,” the poem “The Possessive” explores the unconditional love between a parent and child. One might argue that there was no evidence of love in this poem, but Old's diction clearly highlights the mother's feelings for her son. In fact in the tercet he states: “My daughter”. The word “my” in this first line indicates the connection she has with her daughter and how attached she is, the use of this possessive pronoun shows how she feels. This symbolizes the love she has for her son, as the mother's possessive nature was her method of showing love. Likewise, unconditional love is evident in “Those Winter Sundays”. This father, like the mother Olds writes about, does not verbalize the words I love you but the love is evident through their actions. The speaker in “Those Winter Sundays” tells the reader in the first stanza, “Even on Sundays my father rose early / and dressed in the blue-black cold / then with chapped hands that ached / from labor during the weekdays / lined fire flames. Literally, these lines can be interpreted to mean that his father got up early on Sundays to get wood for the fire in the house, even though his hands were sore and chapped from all the work he did during the week.However, if one were to interpret the alliteration “blue and black” in the second line, it would be symbolic of sadness, pain and discomfort during the winter; however, he gathered wood to light the fire, which can symbolically represent warmth and love for his children. Both children acquired a maturity that led to a change in their relationship with their parents. “What did I know, what did I know/ of the austere and solitary offices of love?” . In these lines the speaker acknowledges that as a child he was unaware of the love shown by his father. He didn't understand what it meant to be a father and carry out the "austere and solitary" tasks that family love demands. The repetition in verse 13 also highlights the son's regret. There is so much meaning tied to this repetition as it appeals to the reader's emotions. The reader may realize that the once young and ignorant son has matured and is now able to recognize and understand his father's method of love. He is now able to understand that his father continually cared for and provided warmth to the family by working hard every day in the cold that caused chapped and sore hands, providing wood for the fire to maintain hiswarm family and also polishing her child's shoe as mentioned in the second quintet “and I polished my beautiful shoes too”. He is now able to understand and appreciate his father's sacrificial love. Similarly in “The Possessive” the reader can deduce that the daughter is in a phase where she is maturing and becoming her own person. However, his mother is afraid of having to let go. As a result of her daughter's maturity, her mother sees the rebellion and states, "Distant fires can be / glimpsed in the resinous light of her eyes / the guard fires of an enemy, a little before / the war begins." Now there is a change in the relationship she has with her mother because she has evolved. Her mother now characterizes her as an enemy, as she realizes that she and her daughter will begin to oppose each other on issues and decisions. Literally these lines can be interpreted to mean that he saw the reflection of fire in his daughter's eyes, however, figuratively this symbolizes war or rebellion between mother and daughter. His diction throughout the poem can also support this as he uses words like "blade", "carbon steel", and "knife grinder". Contrary to "Those Winter Sundays", "The Possessive" shows possessive love. The mother was extremely controlling and jealous. Throughout the poem the reader sees that the mother is angry because her daughter got a haircut that she did not accept. In the first couplet he states "she went to the barber, that knife grinder". Note his choice of diction and use of metaphor. He refers to the barber as a knife sharpener, which could infer that he believes the barber is sharpening his daughter or helping her in the process of rebellion. In the third verse he implies, “The blade of a new fringe / hangs over his red-brown eyes / like carbon steel.” This suggests that there is a change in the daughter, the carbon steel suggests the covering of the daughter's personality that the mother once knew. In “Those Winter Sundays” there is no evidence that the father was possessive. However, the son was a little afraid of his father as in the second verse he states that he “fears the chronic anger of that house”. In this line, the speaker focuses on the emotional relationship he has with his father. The word “chronic” used in this line can infer that anger in the family is constant and recurring. However, this refers to emotions and can be directly linked to the individuals who were in the family. Also, state “that house” instead of classifying it as my house. The reader may conclude that the speaker has retreated from the anger or rages of the house, from the disagreement that led him to be afraid. He also claims to “speak to him with indifference”. From this line the reader can conclude that the relationship with his father was like the weather, cold. Through this statement it is evident that the speaker keeps his distance from his father because they have a strained relationship, as inferred in line nine. Please note: this is just an example. Get a custom paper from our expert writers now. Get a custom essay Both poems, explore the relationship between parents and children. It was evident that the parents loved their children, however the love was different and the relationships were different. The love of a possessive mother causes her child to gain independence and become himself, while the sacrificial love of a hard-working father causes the child to open his eyes to his sacrifices and regret not having reciprocated or shown appreciation for his father's love. Therefore, both parents loved each other unconditionally, without hugs, kisses and without verbalizing the words “I love you”. The love illustrated in these poems between parent and child can be considered deep and long-lasting; a quiet love. On the parenthood train,.. 736.