Bullying has been a social problem that has persisted for years and years. Bullying has been studied from different points of view and angles, and there are various countermeasures and prevention programs, but the problem is continuous. Bullies are taught not to harm others and victims are told to confide in adults, but the trauma causes lasting effects for both parties. To make progress in the fight against bullying, the driving emotion must be at the center of attention. The feeling of shame is the main cause of short- and long-term problems in bullies and victims. Say no to plagiarism. Get a tailor-made essay on "Why Violent Video Games Shouldn't Be Banned"? Get an Original Essay Students who are bullied experience shame that negatively impacts their self-esteem and their ability to form relationships leading to unhealthy coping habits. The feeling of shame occurs when social norms are broken resulting in negative sanctions from peers that include social rejection or even a social reaction. Students who tend to behave independently are usually ostracized or bullied for not conforming to the established lifestyle, resulting in a feeling of shame that causes students to develop negative self-reflections. Daniel Frank in his journal article, “A Principal Reflects on Shame and School Bullying,” states: “Shame is the pain of taking to heart the lethal words of an authority figure, a parent, a teacher, or an esteemed peer, who publicly proclaims their own worthlessness, flaws and vulnerability.” As students are constantly bullied and belittled, they eventually adopt or absorb the negative proclamations as their self-image is warped into someone they are not worthy of being loved or cared for, or someone worthless. Laura Martocci, in her book “Bullying: The Social Destruction of Self”, states that people who let the emotions of pain and shame fester within themselves become bitter, depressed and alienated, which leads to a disengagement between relationships and even life itself. This fracture between the self and the sense of belonging causes an increase in anger or violence (Martocci 5, 70). to recover and heal, which causes mistrust, isolation, and even anger or hatred, which continues into adult life. This anger or violence that comes from the experience of shame leads to unhealthy reactions towards the world. The shame experienced as a consequence of bullying translates into increased anger and violent tendencies in victims, directed towards themselves and society. After keeping intense emotions bottled up for so long, people find it difficult to satisfy their emotional needs. It becomes difficult to recognize your emotions if they have been ignored for long periods of time. Unresolved emotions can trigger greater frustration, irritation, or even anger. Not being able to understand yourself and process emotions effectively can be exasperating. According to Frank, young people direct their anger outward, more often. The internal confusion and struggle caused by shame is such a negative feeling that most victims feel safe following the rule: embarrass before being embarrassed, humiliate before being humiliated. This creates an endless cycle in which the victim becomes the bully, whose victims potentially become the bully themselves. Shame is the root cause of victims' feelings of anger towards the world, which creates a long-term problem of increased victimization when they begin to bully others..”
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